BleacherCoaches.com

SEASON TOTAL:
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THE ANCIENT ENEMY: 373-80
DEBICEPS: 357-96

TUESDAY 10/21/08:
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OHIO VS. TEMPLE
WHOOO? WHOOOO? WHOOOOO? That's an old and wise Owl asking who can beat Temple, and the answer I give him is "NOT OHIO!"


WEDNESDAY 10/22/08:
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AUBURN VS. WEST VIRGINIA
I guess Auburn, but does it even matter?


NEW MEXICO VS. AIR FORCE
Give me the Loborinos on the road against Air Farce


FRIDAY 10/24/08:
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BOISE STATE VS. SAN JOSE STATE
Bigtime matchup, fo' realz. This should be a great game. I'll take Boise close.


MORE TO COME

Frosty did not make the road trip from Athens to Philly. Frank begged him to come so we could hit up the downtown scene afterwards, but alas, Frosty has a dentist appointment tomorrow morning.

I'm actually rooting for Temple.

SATURDAY 10/25/08:
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CINCINNATI VS. UCONN
I hate Randy Edsall. Cincinnati.

NORTHWESTERN VS. INDIANA
Hoosier daddy? Definitely Northwestern.

BOSTON COLLEGE VS. NORTH CAROLINA
UNC at home close.

ILLINOIS VS. WISCONSIN
Heya heya heya heya heya thats Chief Zooker doing the Dance of Death for this jackass Wisconsin squad. I'm sure we'll see Brett Bielema on the sidelines again with that characteristic mentally-retarded look on his face like, "Huh? Me stoopid. Me confused again. Me need brain transplant."

EASTERN MICHIGAN VS. BALL STATE
They're BALLin' in Muncie!!!!

TEXAS TECH VS. KANSAS
A great man, Debiceps, once said: "I am all about the Texas Tech offense, but do not try to pretend you are legitimate." Give me Kansas in the upset, even though Texas Tech sucks.

WAKE FOREST VS. MIAMI
Please, Wake Forest, stop losing!!!! Demon Deacons close.

MINNESOTA VS. PURDUE
You know who's from Minnesota?



That's what I'm talkin' about!!!

CENTRAL MICHIGAN VS. TOLEDO
The Chippewas are a proud football race. They'll win this one.

KENTUCKY VS. FLORIDA
I hate Urban Meyer's guts, but UF by 20.

BAYLOR VS. NEBRASKA
At home, Nebraska.

OKLAHOMA VS. KANSAS STATE
Give me the Barry Switzer's of the world.

LA TECH VS. ARMY
On the cold banks of the Hudson... Army loses again.

UNLV VS. BYU
He'll Brigham Young... and he'll Brigham Wins too!

DUKE VS. VANDERBILT
Stephen Hawking is having multiple orgasms at the news that these two intellectual juggernauts are squaring off. Give me Vanderbilt.

FRESNO STATE VS. UTAH STATE
Fresno.

RICE VS. TULANE
Cheet cheet cheet cheet cheet cheet thats me shaking up soem RICE and another victory!

UCLA VS. CAL
Who the hell cares. Cal.

VIRGINIA TECH VS. FLORIDA STATE
MEOOOOOOW MEOOOOW-MEOOOO-MEOOOOO-MEOOOOW! MEOOOOOOW MEOOOOW-MEOOOO-MEOOOOO-MEOOOOW! That's Ima my parent's cat shaking a paw to the war chant. V-Tech has zero offense and Frank Beemer still has alien-face.

VIRGINIA VS. GEORGIA TECH
Ramblin' Wreck is ramblin' again!!! Give me the Jacketz at home! (I am fully aware that Virginia will win this game, but since my hated rival hates G-Tech and Paul Johnson, I must defend his honor)

SOUTH FLORIDA VS. LOUISVILLE
Colossal egglayers USF are faced with another trap game. BUT... Steve Kragthorpe looks like he coaches little league in Wilmore. USF.

GEORGIA VS. LSU
BORN ON THE BAYOU! BORN ON THE BAYYYYYYOU! LSU at home.

NC STATE VS. MARYLAND
Maryland's QB has Napoleon Dynamite hair. Obviously, I am gonna pick Maryland.

MICHIGAN STATE VS. MICHIGAN
Ya know what, give me Michigan.

OKLAHOMA STATE VS. TEXAS
I kinda love Mike Gundy, but give me Mack Brown at home.

RUTGERS VS. PITT
Pitt by 20.

BOWLING GREEN VS. NORTHERN ILLINOIS
No illy is back on the fast track to success.

SMU VS. NAVY
Well, neither team plays defense, so... Navy at home.

WYOMING VS. TCU
Guess who's looking for a new job this offseason? Wyoming's coach.

NEW MEXICO STATE VS. IDAHO
New Mexico State by 47.

OLE MISS VS. ARKANSAS
The Right Reverand on the road against his hated former friends!!!! One of my most anticipated games of the whole year. Ole Miss!

COLORADO VS. MISSOURI
Dan Hawkins is an idiot. Missouri by 50.

TROY VS. NORTH TEXAS
Although Giovanni Vizza is PROBABLY in the top 16 Italian QBs in the Sun Belt, give me Troy by 4,000 points.

TEXAS A&M VS. IOWA STATE
ISU at home. This mights eriously be the first time I ever picked Iowa State in a Toof n Nail.

MIDDLE TENNESSEE STATE VS. MISSISSIPPI STATE
MSU at home, I guess?

PENN STATE VS. OHIO STATE
ERRRR-RARRR RARRR-RARRRR... RARRRRRRR. Which mascot does that?

ALABAMA VS. TENNESSEE
This is such a tempting upset. But... Alabama.

NOTRE DAME VS. WASHINGTON
I seriously hope ND runs the score up on Willingham.

SOUTHERN MISS VS. MEMPHIS
Memphazzimo

OREGON VS. ARIZONA STATE
Oregizzle

COLORADO STATE VS. SAN DIEGO STATE
Coloraderino

USC VS. ARIZONA
USC by 40.


SUNDAY 10/26/08:
====================

NEVADA VS. HAWAII
Nevada on the road. Dem wolves gon' howl.

UCF VS. TULSA
I love Tulsa so much. My heart is full lof golden hurricane awesomeness.

You know the Deal, It’s all about a Dollar Bill. It also all about the Benjamins, Time to play the Game, and I’m Ready to BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!

Expect me to swoop back and make up Hella ground on the Elephant, which I do every single freaking year.

This is DeBiceps coming straight from the Burg, where Ships can float and Greyhounds don’t always win football games.

Last week, we beat our ancient rival Big Spring to even out at 4-4, and last night our playoff dreams came to an end in a 9-7 loss at AAAA Red Land high school. We have a lot to be proud of, and can still finish out at 5-5 with Senior night at home next week. Expect more posts than you want to see from me starting after next week, due to the fact that I will be home for more than 3 hours a day.

Anyway, enough about me.

Let me say this:

Notre Dame fans are idiots. There’s one at my school who’s ball-busting on PSU has been this: “Yeah, you were down at the half against Michigan.” My rebutle: “And we scored 39 straight points.” His comeback “You didn’t score in the first quarter about temple.” Mine, “Yeah, and we scored 28 in the second.” Some people are doomed to Idiocracy (which by the way, is the worst movie in the history of man.. way worse than that sasquatch movie Dut made us watch last Christmas). Also, Duke and South Carolina are still garbage. I don’t care if the Canes aren’t the Canes (which they will be next year again), that was a game that program needed to win. And South Carolina’s struggles are borderline comical and 100% ridiculous. Spurrier is the guy who’s confidence is contagious, and who makes his team better by giving them the same swagger he has. Instead, his team seams clueless, and I cant point at anyone but the head coach. Mizzou is still Mizzou, and proved that they’ll be an excellent 9-4 team for the next decade. Finally, Kudos for Ok State. Theyre playing so well that the “im a man, I’m 40” has become more than irrelevant.

Lou Holtz thinks Rich Rod is every bit the leader Hitler was, and I’m about to pick the winners. Check it.

SATURDAY 10/25/08:
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CINCINNATI VS. UCONN
I picture heaven being a place with Primanti brothers sandwhiches, American Eskimos running free, and Bearcats swinging from trees. Cincy.

NORTHWESTERN VS. INDIANA
Indiana is about to have a Purple Nurple.. and a Fat lip.

BOSTON COLLEGE VS. NORTH CAROLINA
Hey Butch, way to hold on last week. BC is going to leave Chapel Hill with ‘Baccy stains all over their shirts.

ILLINOIS VS. WISCONSIN
Here’s the promise: Badgers win.
Here’s the pick: Illinois
Here’s the truth: I don’t have the balls or the brains to actually pick the Badgers.

EASTERN MICHIGAN VS. BALL STATE
We stay Fly, No lie, You Know this! BALL STATE!

TEXAS TECH VS. KANSAS
No way TT wins this week. Mangino celebrates with a 6 foot party sub, bucket of bacon grease and an IV of chocolate chip milkshakes.

WAKE FOREST VS. MIAMI
Picked against them last week, and for that I should be whipped with a thorny reed. Canes by 7.

MINNESOTA VS. PURDUE
The exterminator cant get rid of the Gophers. No, it takes a man with another craft. An artist. A Painter.

CENTRAL MICHIGAN VS. TOLEDO
I got a LeFeavor, and the only prescription is more Touchdowns!

KENTUCKY VS. FLORIDA
Kentucky is banged up. Florida is somehow ahead of USC in the rankings. Gators chompin all the way to a 40 point victory.

BAYLOR VS. NEBRASKA
Brasky man, brasky pants.. Nebrask? Nebrask..

OKLAHOMA VS. KANSAS STATE
Kud keeps it close.. OU by 10

LA TECH VS. ARMY
You know that Knife thing on the tips of guns from the civil war? Yeah, Army is about to drive that into the stomach of La Tech.

UNLV VS. BYU
BYU by 17

DUKE VS. VANDERBILT
For the second consecutive week, I’m taking the blue devils. Someone please punch me in the face.

FRESNO STATE VS. UTAH STATE
Bulldogs by 7

RICE VS. TULANE
Take the Over. Tulane close.

UCLA VS. CAL
Cal by 30.

VIRGINIA TECH VS. FLORIDA STATE
Vtech in the upset

VIRGINIA VS. GEORGIA TECH
If I ever meet paul Johnson I’m spitting on his shoes and hitting him in the shin with a pvc pipe. Take that.

Cavs

SOUTH FLORIDA VS. LOUISVILLE
Bald Bull delivering the bull charge!

GEORGIA VS. LSU
Tigers by 14

NC STATE VS. MARYLAND
You know something, Tom Harken.. We’re gonna go to Vermont! And We’re gonna go to Michigan! And we’re gonna go to Maryland! And we’re gonna pick against Tom Obrien every week! BEEYAWWW!

MICHIGAN STATE VS. MICHIGAN
Richrod leads like Hitler. Hitler lost. So will the Renes.

OKLAHOMA STATE VS. TEXAS
Party’s over, OSU. Here’s the deal though, if Ok St wins, they should legitimately be number 1.

RUTGERS VS. PITT
Whats better than picking a winner? Picking a winner that isn’t Pitt.


BOWLING GREEN VS. NORTHERN ILLINOIS
Wow.. this is tough.. Give me the Uniforms over the Nickname

SMU VS. NAVY
Southern Methodist. I hope Craig James gets in a car wreck that doesn’t kill him but damages his brain enough to turn him into a non-douchebag

WYOMING VS. TCU
TCU

NEW MEXICO STATE VS. IDAHO
IdadontthinksoO!

OLE MISS VS. ARKANSAS
Ole Miss by 14

COLORADO VS. MISSOURI
Mizzou off two straight losses? At home? With a chubby overrated system qb? Wow this one’s gonna be ugly for the buffs.

TROY VS. NORTH TEXAS
The Trojans will put holes in Dut’s boys like Brad Pitt in Troy

TEXAS A&M VS. IOWA STATE
She moves her body like a CYCLONE! And she makes me wanna do it all NIGHT LONG!

MIDDLE TENNESSEE STATE VS. MISSISSIPPI STATE
I’ll take that Sly cat and his group of underachievers over a bunch of retard option runners from 2003

PENN STATE VS. OHIO STATE
And the Nittany Lion sat upon his mighty perch. He sat, and he watched. He saw the tree grow. He saw the fruit on the tree. He swiped it with his mighty paw. He was happy, and it was good.

Kirk Herbstriet and his 4 kids are gonna cry, cry the night away!

ALABAMA VS. TENNESSEE
Taking the Vols simply for the ramifications it could possibly have on PSUs national championship hopes

NOTRE DAME VS. WASHINGTON
Give me the Huskies! Die slow, Substitute Gym Teacher!!

SOUTHERN MISS VS. MEMPHIS
Name is project pat-ahh. Playa from the Sizzouth! (NORTH MEMPHIS) Always pack the Gat-ahhh (NORTH MEMPHIS!) Gold teeth in my Mizzouth! (NORTH MEMPHIS!)

OREGON VS. ARIZONA STATE
Arizona state does the devil dance on the week before hallows eve.

COLORADO STATE VS. SAN DIEGO STATE
Love them whites. (Referring to the uniforms, not the race)

USC VS. ARIZONA
No way SC wins by less than 35

SUNDAY 10/26/08:
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NEVADA VS. HAWAII
Hawaii doesn’t win in the US. They also don’t lose at Hawaii. Expect a bunch of sh*t to blow all over the field and a bunch of angry mainland haters to disrupt the wolfpack

UCF VS. TULSA
PLEASE put up over 70 again.. PLEASE

TAE, no hate, but you did terrible this week.

hahahaha I know!

All that really matters, though, is that your team won. Gotta give PSU props. Pryor got what he deserved.

He's pretty much all OSU has coming back next year, too.