Any good jokes?
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playbookboy06
- Grad Assistant
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captain dean
- Official BleacherCoach
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BillyWhiteShoesJohnson
- Senior
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- Location: modern day meanmar
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Two immigrants arrive in the United States and are discussing the difference between the Old Country and the U.S. One of them says that he's heard that people in the U.S. eat dogs, and if they're going to fit in, they better eat dogs as well. So they head to the nearest hot dog stand and order two 'dogs.' The first guy unwraps his, looks at it, and nervously looks at his friend.
"What part did you get?"
"What part did you get?"
Small Feeet, Small Feeet!
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cerberusjw
- Assistant Coach
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- Location: ''The little town that can''
Nice 1 Billy 
sorry guys u proly already herd this 1, but ill take a shot @ it
An old Lady Driving on Highway Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the front seat and three in the back,wide eyed and pale as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him, Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?" Ma'am," the officer replies, you weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers." Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that 22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error. But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time," the officer asks. Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119."
sorry guys u proly already herd this 1, but ill take a shot @ it
An old Lady Driving on Highway Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies, two in the front seat and three in the back,wide eyed and pale as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him, Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?" Ma'am," the officer replies, you weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers." Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that 22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error. But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time," the officer asks. Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119."
SEAHAWKS 8)
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cerberusjw
- Assistant Coach
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- Location: ''The little town that can''
eh?
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playbookboy06
- Grad Assistant
- Posts: 231
- Joined: September 15th, 2003, 3:51 pm
This is my last one, i can't share all my good material...
This shy guy boards a plane for a business flight across the country. And he is luckily seated beside this beautiful young lady. About mid-flight he musters up enough confidence to try to start a conversation. He notices that the women is reading a book on sexual statistics. So the man asks if she learned anything interesting from reading that book. The women replies, "as a matter of fact, yes, it states that the race of men with the longest genitals are native American Indians, and the race of men with the thickest genitals are Polish people." She then says, "by-the-way, my name is Sherry, what's yours?" The man slyly replies, "Tonto Kawalski"
This shy guy boards a plane for a business flight across the country. And he is luckily seated beside this beautiful young lady. About mid-flight he musters up enough confidence to try to start a conversation. He notices that the women is reading a book on sexual statistics. So the man asks if she learned anything interesting from reading that book. The women replies, "as a matter of fact, yes, it states that the race of men with the longest genitals are native American Indians, and the race of men with the thickest genitals are Polish people." She then says, "by-the-way, my name is Sherry, what's yours?" The man slyly replies, "Tonto Kawalski"
Root, Root, Root for the home team
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BillyWhiteShoesJohnson
- Senior
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- Joined: September 23rd, 2003, 1:20 pm
- Location: modern day meanmar
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Nice one bookboy06....
Heres one for some of u who dont have me on ur buddy list....
A couple went to church every week, but the husband would always fall asleep. The wife decided to bring a needle to the next service and poke him when he nodded off. The next week in church the husband fell asleep. "Who created the Earth in 6 days and rested on the 7th?" The wife stuck her husband with the needle and he jumped up and yelled, "Oh my God!" The preacher said, "Correct" He soon fell asleep again.The preacher got to the question "Who died on the cross to save us from eternal damnation" The wife stuck her husband and he said, "Jesus Christ" And the preacher said, "Yes" The preached shortly asked "What did Mary say to Joseph after Jesus was born?" The wife poked her husband again, and her husband jumped up and yelled, "If you stick that dang thing in me again, I'm going to break it in half!" The preacher fainted...
Heres one for some of u who dont have me on ur buddy list....
A couple went to church every week, but the husband would always fall asleep. The wife decided to bring a needle to the next service and poke him when he nodded off. The next week in church the husband fell asleep. "Who created the Earth in 6 days and rested on the 7th?" The wife stuck her husband with the needle and he jumped up and yelled, "Oh my God!" The preacher said, "Correct" He soon fell asleep again.The preacher got to the question "Who died on the cross to save us from eternal damnation" The wife stuck her husband and he said, "Jesus Christ" And the preacher said, "Yes" The preached shortly asked "What did Mary say to Joseph after Jesus was born?" The wife poked her husband again, and her husband jumped up and yelled, "If you stick that dang thing in me again, I'm going to break it in half!" The preacher fainted...
Small Feeet, Small Feeet!