The Fun Belt.
Posted: October 16th, 2005, 6:25 am

Taking their idea of a harder, meaner logo one step farther, the UNT High Command decided to change the mascot as well. No longer the "Eagles" or the "Mean Green", the school is now known as the North Texas Inquisition, just so the vast amounts of Mexicans in the area are reminded of what can happen when they get sick of working for 2.00 a day. The plan for striking fear into Mexicans and opponents backfired, however, when one of the acid-loving field-painters accidentally sprayed "INCOMPETENCE" real big in the end zone. After a unanimous vote by the student body, the word remainded, being that it better suits this horrible, horrible team.
No one cares about this except me, so here goes:
North Texas has won the Sun Belt multiple times in a row. Earlier this season, the Mean Green dropped a conference game to Troy, which looked like it was the death-knell of the consecutive conference titles won by UNT. However, Troy managed to get their asses beat by Louisiana Monroe yesterday. How? Lord knows. But here's the SBC standings:

Sun-Belt Conference President Dr. Hugginsworth "Chuckles" Soggybottom promises even MORE Sun Belt football excitement in the 2nd half of the season!!!
2005 S. Belt Standings
TEAM CONF OVERALL
Louisiana Monroe (3-0) 3-4
Arkansas State (2-1) 3-3
North Texas (2-1) 2-3
Middle Tenn. St. (1-1) 2-3
Troy (1-1) 2-4
Fla Atlantic (1-2) 1-6
Florida Intl (0-2) 1-4
La Lafayette (0-2) 1-5
As you can see, many, many crappy teams all have 1 loss, with Monroe actually leading the conference right now. Here's who the teams have left:
Monroe: has to play Both UNT and Mid Tennessee State
Arkansas State: MTSU, Troy, and North Texas
UNT: Monroe and Arkansas State
MTSU: ASU, Monroe, Troy
Troy: ASU, MTSU

A big fan of boneheaded playcalling, North Texas Head-Coach Darrell Dickey has allowed last year's national rushing champion to continue his dominant success in 2005, with 37 carries for 153 yards and no touchdowns in 5 games.
So as you can see, UNT still has a shot of winning this horrible conference, and then they can go play horrible football in a bowl game and get their brains kicked all over the parking lot by some horrible C-USA team like Southern Methodist.
And for the record, UNT quarterback Daniel Meager is STILL kicking all kinds of ****, with 363 passing yards and zero TD's in 5 games. Way to go, guys!!!!
Across the state, Cody Hodges has 2,461 yards with 21 touchdowns.

Starting UNT left-guard Snickers blames shoddy salmon-flavored food and not enough cuddling for his lackluster performance so far this season.