LIVE THE DREAM: PENN STATE LOOKING FOR PLAYERS

The Ancient Enemy · December 19th, 2006, 10:22 am

With the recent, huge acquisitions of Ako Potti and Joe Suhey, Penn State has decided that the few remaining scholarships are up for grabs. As shown by the verbal commitments of the 2 names listed above, anyone who wants to play for Penn State is free to do so. Just send in this application in care of Head-Coach Jay Paterno. This is a once in a lifetime chance for all you Nittany Lion fans to live the dream and play on the same team as Penn State legends Anthony Morelli and Ryan Breen. Age, sex, height, weight, none of that matters. Penn State has to hurry up and fill all the scholarships before they are forced to sign players like LeSean McCoy or Broderick Green.

Fill out the form below.

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NAME:
= Special Note: there will be immediate acceptance of anyone who has the same last name as anyone who has ever played on a Penn State football team

CRIMINAL BACKGROUND:
= Special Note: please only send in this application if you have done something, or aspire to do something, that we will be forced to sweep under the carpet

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
= Special Note: please do not submit this application unless you have less than 1 year of combined football experience in your lifetime

POSITION:
= Special Note: you will be immediately on the field starting at this position the day you step on campus

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As a Penn State fan, I urge you all to mail this in ASAP. I do NOT want Penn State to be able to chase quality players for scholarships.

moto · Post by **moto** » December 19th, 2006, 12:49 pm

someone needs to lays off Penn State sure they need a new head coach but they be back give some time and a new coach

vman · Post by **vman** » December 19th, 2006, 2:24 pm

Hey now, never one to bash another, I'll simply offer free grammatical services...if agreeable (now that's PC)! Hello moto!

Goodwill · Post by **Goodwill** » December 19th, 2006, 2:35 pm

Ah yes I am still offering free therapy to you vman. I feel the love, don't you?

vman · Post by **vman** » December 19th, 2006, 4:55 pm

Absolutely G'will, and i sincerely appreciate the offer but if you could help me with some Christmas shopping that would be more helpful presently!
You know pick up a couple gift certificates etc...Already put in like 10 hrs, with a couple more to go...busy, busy, busy! What say you?

vman · Post by **vman** » December 19th, 2006, 6:39 pm

NAME:
= Gustavio "Gumy" Guman...my Cousin, Father, Great Grandfather, and Sister all played for Joe Pa

CRIMINAL BACKGROUND:
= Well I do bow hunt, so there is potential there; I have a famous Uncle who used to ref UPS home games & he shoulda done 5 to 10 @ Levinworth or was that Woolworth's, for the the jobs he pulled on visiting FB teams!

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
= Well I have very little but plan on playing one year for King Don 'cause everyone knows he only sends good players to college

POSITION:
= Since you only have 43 players listed @ TE or WR, I thought I'd throw my helmet into that mix.

PS I plan on being a cop, forest ranger or bartender. Any majors like Crim Justice, Parks & Rec or Hotel Mgt.

Post by **Coach** » December 19th, 2006, 10:10 pm

I am sorry, but I like the Ako pickup. He is an OL that has already matured and grown into a pretty darn good lineman at the JUCO level. Many teams get JUCO's yearly especially on the line and they do a nice job. This guy will arrive in January and contend (and probably win) a starting job next year as a Junior. The kid is brought in as a guy that can play now at a position where he is very much needed.

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