Big Ten for Heisman.

[The Ancient Enemy]

In the week 1 installment of our new weekly BC show "Big Ten Trainwreck" I will provide quotes from the best player in the solar system Terrelle Pryor as well as do a rundown of all the great performances by the Big Ten programs this week.

Some quick-hitters from Terrelle Pryor's little interview:

- Had "Mike Vick" written on his sun-block tape.
- Looks up to Mike Vick as a "role model".
- Great quote 1: "Everyone kills people, murders people..." Really? Everyone kills people and murders people. I guess I better hurry up, I only have 1 hr to meet my daily murder-quota.
- Great Quote 2 (regarding the Navy players, who Ohio State needed an INT returned for a TD to defeat at the end of a tough game): "Not that they're good, it's just the type of guys they are."

BIG TEN RUN-DOWN BROUGHT TO YOU BY PEPTO-BISMOL: "PEPTO-BISMOL... WHEN YOUR TEAM NEEDS 2 BLOCKED FG'S IN THE LAST SERIES TO DEFEAT A I-AA SCHOOL, THE ONE THAT COATS IS THE ONLY ONE YOU NEED."

PENN STATE VS. AKRON:
- Passing game looked good. Needed to play Newsome a series earlier than they did. Run-blocking is questionable, pass blocking very good. Stepfon Green is terrible. Defense played great. Get Brett Brackett off the field and play Drake or someone else. Walt and JD had a great gameplan, just didnt have the personnel today: 3-3-5 to force the pass w/ untested WRs, Moye just ended up having a great game and so did Clark (mostly).

IOWA VERSUS WHOEVER THEY PLAYED:
- Why the **** was Iowa ranked when they lost Greene, both great DL, and Hampton? They have an otherwise average team just like they have for 3-4 years. They upset PSU and everyone thinks they're a top 25 team a season later? Aye carumba.

WISCONSIN VERSUS NORTHERN ILLINOIS:
- No Illy has one of the worst returning defenses in college football. Nice game today, Bielema. You continue to be one of my all-time favorite comedians.

MINNESOTA VERSUS SYRACUSE:
- Even playing against a QB who hasn't thrown a pass in 4 years, Minnesota still needed OT to beat the worst BCS roster in history. Maybe you shouldn't have changed DC's every year for the past 15 seasons, simply b/c you have unrealistic expectations for a garbage program. Let Brewster build the program for you and stay out of his way, please.

ILLINOIS VERSUS MISSOURI:
- I unfortunately subjected myself to this, and I could not turn away as if I was staring at a car accident. Illinois, who is coached by a guy who is supposed to be a master motivator, had no motivation. How do you have no motivation, in the first game in 8 months, against a rival?

OHIO STATE VERSUS NAVY:
- Listen: the whole "they run an offense that is hard to play against" argument should be gone by halftime. Ohio State legitimately almost lost this game. Do you realize what USC is going to do to you next week?

MICHIGAN VERSUS WESTERN MICHIGAN:
- UM fans are skyhigh after defeating a WMU team who has one of the worst defenses in the nation. Congratulations. You guys are indeed correct when you say "we're back". You're gonna be back until next week when Notre Dame beats you (making me throw up twice as much as usual).

NORTHWESTERN, PURDUE, AND MICHIGAN STATE:
- Thank you for showing up for work today.

INDIANA VERSUS EASTERN KENTUCKY:
- Really? Eastern Kentucky? I literally have never even heard of them. They held you scoreless in the 2nd half and you barely beat them.

This concludes our week 1 rundown on why the Big Ten is officially at rock bottom.

[deliverance]

I didn't get to see any of the Missouri vs. Illinois game, but it sounded like it was a beat down. Isn't Illinois suppose to be like the fourth best team in the Big 10? Missouri lost Chase Daniel and Jeremy Maclin from last year's team and should not be that good this year. I would think Missouri will finish around eighth overall in the Big 12. I have to agree with you that the Big 10 must be horrible again this year. That's not exactly shocking, though.

[vman]

I thought it would be the big 2 this yr. > UPS & OSU...after watching a good bit of the Navy game I think OSU may get walloped next wk (although I thought USC would be ripe for 3 or more losses this yr. OSU, ND & 1 or 2 in Conf.) Could the Nitwits run the table w/out much resistance ??

[frostlion]

Such much nervous the local papers and fans are here in Buckeye-land. Bucknuts.com has been in complete and total meltdown for almost a solid 24 hours. It amazes me how Buckeye fans destroy Tressel for his conservative approach to football, even though it arguably won them a national title and at least a share of four straight B10 titles.

[abpk2903]

Iowa may very well may have 2 losses when they come to Penn State (which is sad considering they only play Iowa State and Arizona who both will finish at the bottom of their conferences).

[TheReason]

USC played Sanjose State.. nice tune up for OSU huh